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Deprecated: Return type of WP_Theme::offsetUnset($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetUnset(mixed $offset): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home2/falafrid/public_html/wp-includes/class-wp-theme.php on line 544

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Deprecated: Return type of WP_REST_Request::offsetGet($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetGet(mixed $offset): mixed, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home2/falafrid/public_html/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-request.php on line 980

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Deprecated: Return type of WP_REST_Request::offsetUnset($offset) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetUnset(mixed $offset): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home2/falafrid/public_html/wp-includes/rest-api/class-wp-rest-request.php on line 1003

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Deprecated: Return type of FS_Key_Value_Storage::offsetUnset($k) should either be compatible with ArrayAccess::offsetUnset(mixed $offset): void, or the #[\ReturnTypeWillChange] attribute should be used to temporarily suppress the notice in /home2/falafrid/public_html/wp-content/plugins/ajax-search-for-woocommerce/fs/lib/includes/managers/class-fs-key-value-storage.php on line 313

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{"id":3780,"date":"2019-03-04T08:00:49","date_gmt":"2019-03-04T11:00:49","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/?p=3780"},"modified":"2020-12-10T23:26:28","modified_gmt":"2020-12-11T02:26:28","slug":"todo-mundo-quer-um-match","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/opiniao\/todo-mundo-quer-um-match\/","title":{"rendered":"Todo mundo quer um match"},"content":{"rendered":"\r\n
\r\n

Dia desses vi uma pessoa no Facebook recomendando o document\u00e1rio \u201cUndateable<\/em>\u201d na Netflix. Trata-se de uma s\u00e9rie de hist\u00f3rias de pessoas com defici\u00eancia enfrentando a dura jornada em busca de um amor. S\u00e3o v\u00e1rias pessoas com todo tipo de s\u00edndromes e defici\u00eancias mostrando suas rotinas e como lidam com a falta de oportunidade de experimentarem um relacionamento.<\/p>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Inicialmente, relutei em assistir por temer ser mais uma daquelas narrativas cheias de sentimentalismos e carregadas de dramaticidades, mas achei melhor dar uma chance, j\u00e1 que para criticar uma coisa \u00e9 preciso conhec\u00ea-la. Para minha surpresa, foi um \u00f3timo engano. Ao inv\u00e9s daquele discurso enfadonho de supera\u00e7\u00e3o, encontramos ali hist\u00f3rias de pessoas reais com sonhos de vida e desejos como qualquer outra. Entretanto, em fun\u00e7\u00e3o de sua defici\u00eancia, encontram dificuldades para socializar e, consequentemente, para se relacionar com algu\u00e9m.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Todo o document\u00e1rio se passa na Inglaterra, onde alguns sites de relacionamento se propuseram a auxiliar pessoas com defici\u00eancia encontrarem \u201csua alma g\u00eamea\u201d. Ao inv\u00e9s de usarem aplicativos comuns como Tinder, por exemplo, elas recorrem a estas empresas para conseguirem achar algu\u00e9m compat\u00edvel com seus perfis.\u00a0S\u00e3o v\u00e1rios personagens, cada um com um hist\u00f3rico diferente. H\u00e1 casos mais brandos onde a defici\u00eancia n\u00e3o afetou tanto o f\u00edsico da pessoa, at\u00e9 aqueles em que as doen\u00e7as causaram v\u00e1rias les\u00f5es no corpo.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Pessoas normais, \u00e9 claro.<\/strong><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

O que me atraiu no document\u00e1rio foi mostrar o lado humano de cada um. As pessoas com defici\u00eancia s\u00e3o apresentadas em seu dia a dia, trabalhando e saindo com amigos. Alguns ainda moram com seus pais, mas outros vivem sozinhos recebendo ajuda em pequenas atividades dom\u00e9sticas. Essa pequena depend\u00eancia n\u00e3o \u00e9 exacerbada, sendo mostrada com naturalidade. Qualquer um pode precisar de um auxiliar para limpar a casa, n\u00e3o \u00e9?<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

As defici\u00eancias e s\u00edndromes ocupavam \u201co seu lugar\u201d, ou seja, s\u00e3o mostradas como uma diferen\u00e7a normal. Como se criasse um par\u00e2metro invis\u00edvel para o espectador em um discurso \u201cfulano tem dificuldades de expressar seus sentimentos por causa do autismo e por isso fica nervoso com primeiros encontros, mas todos ficamos ansiosos quando vamos conhecer algu\u00e9m pela primeira vez\u201d.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

O valor de um match<\/strong><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

O n\u00e3o envolvimento com as hist\u00f3rias \u00e9 imposs\u00edvel devido a esse n\u00edvel de proximidade que criamos com os personagens. Conforme avan\u00e7amos nos epis\u00f3dios, vamos nos familiarizando com as defici\u00eancias de cada um e terminamos sem compreender como algu\u00e9m n\u00e3o d\u00e1 uma chance para aquelas pessoas. Por isso considero que\u00a0Undateable<\/em> (ou \u201cOs impeg\u00e1veis\u201d em uma tradu\u00e7\u00e3o bem livre) \u00e9 um document\u00e1rio para quem n\u00e3o tem defici\u00eancia.\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Muitas vezes dizemos para voc\u00eas, sem defici\u00eancia, nossas dificuldades quando falamos sobre relacionamentos. Muitas vezes, alguns na tentativa de diminuir nossas dores costumam dizer \u201cn\u00e3o \u00e9 bem assim\u201d, \u201cisso \u00e9 coisa da sua cabe\u00e7a\u201d e por a\u00ed vai. Entretanto, lidar com anos de recusa pode nos causar problemas de autoconfian\u00e7a, autoestima e de socializa\u00e7\u00e3o piorando ainda mais as possibilidades de conhecer algu\u00e9m.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Pessoalmente, acho covardia desconsiderar essa realidade de solid\u00e3o da pessoa com defici\u00eancia. O capacitismo<\/a> pode destruir uma mente. Nem todos conseguem enfrent\u00e1-lo sem ajuda de profissionais ou de familiares. Ali\u00e1s, na grande maioria dos casos, a fam\u00edlia contribui para esse estado de infantiliza\u00e7\u00e3o da pessoa impedindo seu amadurecimento.<\/strong><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Por isso, recomendo que assistam e observem\u00a0como somos iguais a voc\u00eas quando o assunto \u00e9 o desejo de ser amado. Acredito que \u00e9 um bom momento para abrir a mente e mudar o olhar. Com certeza vale MUITO a pena!<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Uma pequena cr\u00edtica<\/strong><\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Apesar de ser uma \u00f3tima oportunidade para refletirmos e expormos nossas dificuldades de relacionamentos, surgiram em mim alguns inc\u00f4modos enquanto assistia. S\u00e3o eles:<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Valoriza\u00e7\u00e3o exagerada dos relacionamentos<\/strong> N\u00e3o quero menosprezar aqui a solid\u00e3o que experimentamos durante nossa vida, tampouco ignorar os sentimentos de cada personagem, mas confesso minha preocupa\u00e7\u00e3o ao observar tamanha car\u00eancia em alguns. Apesar de saber como \u00e9 bom ter algu\u00e9m ao nosso lado, isso n\u00e3o deve ser nossa \u00fanica raz\u00e3o de ser. Por isso, mencionei a import\u00e2ncia da fam\u00edlia em oferecer uma educa\u00e7\u00e3o que promova a autonomia da pessoa com defici\u00eancia. Talvez esse \u201ctom\u201d seja proposital no document\u00e1rio, mas me incomodou.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

A necessidade de \u201cabrir\u201d uma brecha em sites de relacionamentos<\/strong> Neste ponto entra a famosa quest\u00e3o \u201cseparar para nivelar\u201d. Ou seja, ainda precisamos estipular cotas para que possamos ter a mesma oportunidade. Eis a import\u00e2ncia de se combater os preconceitos atitudinais, desconstruir velhos pensamentos a respeito da defici\u00eancia, fazendo com que nossas semelhan\u00e7as consigam superar as diferen\u00e7as.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

O perigo do mito da rela\u00e7\u00e3o com iguais<\/strong> Achei muito interessante ver o esfor\u00e7o da empresa em buscar pessoas com dificuldades de aprendizagem para se relacionarem entre si, contudo me preocupou o modo como o espectador sem defici\u00eancia pudesse compreender isso. \u00c9 muito comum ouvirmos pessoas dizerem \u201cah, voc\u00ea \u00e9 cadeirante poderia namorar algu\u00e9m cadeirante tamb\u00e9m\u201d como n\u00e3o nos restasse outra op\u00e7\u00e3o a n\u00e3o ser envolver com nossos pares. Acho importante entenderem que tamb\u00e9m temos a op\u00e7\u00e3o de nos apaixonar por qualquer um, indo al\u00e9m dos estere\u00f3tipos.<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

Tirando isso, n\u00e3o deixe de assistir, hein?\u00a0<\/p>\r\n\r\n\r\n\r\n

* Este texto foi originalmente publicado no Disbuga<\/a> em 15 maio 2018.<\/p>\r\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dia desses vi uma pessoa no Facebook recomendando o document\u00e1rio \u201cUndateable\u201d na Netflix. Trata-se de uma s\u00e9rie de hist\u00f3rias de pessoas com defici\u00eancia enfrentando a dura jornada em busca de um amor. S\u00e3o v\u00e1rias pessoas com todo tipo de s\u00edndromes e defici\u00eancias mostrando suas rotinas e como lidam com a falta de oportunidade de experimentarem […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":43,"featured_media":7949,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[205,125],"tags":[75,74,166],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3780"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/43"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3780"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3780\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7950,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3780\/revisions\/7950"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/7949"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3780"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3780"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3780"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}