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{"id":2468,"date":"2020-05-08T08:00:03","date_gmt":"2020-05-08T11:00:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/?p=2468"},"modified":"2021-02-18T11:26:36","modified_gmt":"2021-02-18T14:26:36","slug":"padecendo-no-paraiso","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/feminismo\/padecendo-no-paraiso\/","title":{"rendered":"Padecendo no para\u00edso"},"content":{"rendered":"N\u00e3o curto escrever sobre maternidade e filhos. Sempre acho meus textos sobre o assunto meio pretensiosos. Como todas as m\u00e3es, sempre exagero na admira\u00e7\u00e3o pela minha prole, at\u00e9 os defeitos me divertem, mas acho que pras outras pessoas \u00e9 um pouco chato. As crian\u00e7as s\u00e3o sempre interessantes pra quem as ama loucamente.<\/p>\n
Ocorre que uma das fridas pediu pra eu escrever. Me disse que as leitoras do Fala Frida t\u00eam filhos pequenos e que seria um alento ouvir uma m\u00e3e com filhos mais velhos.<\/p>\n
Recusei de cara porque sei que n\u00e3o posso oferecer nenhum consolo pra quem enfrenta o desafio de criar outro ser humano. Tenho dentro de casa um dos exemplares da esp\u00e9cie humana mais dif\u00edceis de lidar. Um adolescente sem nenhum ju\u00edzo que quer voar, praticamente reprovado no oitavo ano, \u00e9 uma criatura doce, carinhosa e sedutora. Amo-o de um jeito que me emociona, me arrebata, mas fazer dele um sujeito legal suga todas as minhas energias e todo o meu dinheiro, queima os meus neur\u00f4nios e leva os meus nervos ao limite.<\/p>\n
Sou uma pessoa naturalmente exagerada, mas criar filhos n\u00e3o \u00e9 moleza. Ent\u00e3o resolvi escrever, vamos chorar abra\u00e7adas!<\/p>\n
A maternidade, como tudo na vida que a gente quer fazer direito, exige muita entrega, estudo, planejamento, organiza\u00e7\u00e3o e amor.<\/p>\n
E, como a pr\u00f3pria vida, alguma coisa sempre sai dos trilhos, o inesperado nos surpreende, os planos n\u00e3o d\u00e3o certo. N\u00e3o importa o quanto a gente se preparou, a coisa tem vida pr\u00f3pria, literalmente. E tem um detalhe, pequeno detalhe: a gente n\u00e3o pode desistir, pedir demiss\u00e3o, se separar, encerrar a empresa, partir pra outra, o neg\u00f3cio \u00e9 pra vida toda.<\/p>\n
A maternidade vai nos dando uma li\u00e7\u00e3o atr\u00e1s da outra, \u00e9 um sacode sem fim, porque as coisas que a gente planejou, nunca saem, exatamente, como a gente planejou. Parto, amamenta\u00e7\u00e3o, alimenta\u00e7\u00e3o, desenvolvimento motor, alfabetiza\u00e7\u00e3o, relacionamentos, sa\u00fade e um sem fim de outras coisas dependem de in\u00fameras vari\u00e1veis que a gente simplesmente n\u00e3o controla.<\/p>\n
N\u00e3o consegui ter nenhum parto normal, a amamenta\u00e7\u00e3o foi um tormento, felizmente o desenvolvimento deles foi dentro do esperado, n\u00e3o tenho nenhum problema com a alimenta\u00e7\u00e3o, mas crio dois seres humanos absolutamente diferentes, com demandas e caracter\u00edsticas que me desafiam a todo instante.<\/p>\n
Os primeiros tr\u00eas anos foram de muita rala\u00e7\u00e3o f\u00edsica e intelectual. Melhorou muito na fase que chamo de \u201cfase de ouro da inf\u00e2ncia\u201d, dos quatro at\u00e9 os nove, se o teu filho n\u00e3o tiver nenhum problema de sa\u00fade, dificuldade de aprendizado ou de intera\u00e7\u00e3o social, voc\u00ea vai ter um pouco de tranquilidade. Mas quando chegar perto da adolesc\u00eancia voc\u00ea vai rachar a cabe\u00e7a e, \u00e0s vezes, o cora\u00e7\u00e3o, para fazer dele uma pessoinha decente.<\/p>\n
T\u00f4 aprendendo a ser m\u00e3e faz, quase, quatorze anos e, recentemente, tomei um sacode bonito. Daqueles que te deixam atordoada.<\/p>\n
Olho pros meus filhos e os acho infinitamente mais bem preparados pra vida do que eu e meu marido, o pai deles, fomos. S\u00e3o mais inteligentes, mais bonitos, praticam esportes, fazem ingl\u00eas desde os cinco anos, estudam num \u00f3timo col\u00e9gio, t\u00eam forma\u00e7\u00e3o espiritual, viajam, conhecem o mundo bem al\u00e9m da nossa cidade, s\u00e3o feministas, politicamente corretos sem serem chatos, t\u00eam senso de humor, paladar apurado e, mod\u00e9stia \u00e0 parte, pais super interessados, que correm atr\u00e1s, participam de tudo, estudam junto, d\u00e3o afeto, estimulam.<\/p>\n
Conclus\u00e3o l\u00f3gica pra mim, m\u00e3e aquariana:\u00a0eles t\u00eam potencial transformador, podem contribuir pra que o mundo seja um lugar melhor, tem responsabilidade social, v\u00e3o quebrar tudo, arrasar quarteir\u00e3o, ahhh esses meus filhos incr\u00edveis!!<\/p>\n
S\u00f3 que n\u00e3o!!! De onde eu tirei toda essa bobagem? Eu que sou metida a ser a mais cool, relax na educa\u00e7\u00e3o dos filhos, acho at\u00e9 que eles nem precisam fazer faculdade se n\u00e3o quiserem, agora inventei que as duas criaturas precisam salvar o planeta. Pirei, n\u00e9? E o pior? Falei isso pra eles. Mais de uma vez.<\/p>\n
E se o meu menino arranjar um emprego banal, tiver um vida comum, como a minha? E se a minha menina quiser casar cedo e ter filhos? Eles podem ser e fazer o que bem entenderem, eu n\u00e3o domino isso e todas as minhas expectativas v\u00e3o pesar cruelmente sobre eles se eu n\u00e3o parar com essas maluquices.<\/p>\n
Voc\u00eas j\u00e1 imaginaram o quanto vai doer se o meu filho rodar? Vai doer muito, porque eu inventei essa bobagem. Rodar n\u00e3o \u00e9 nada demais. Acho at\u00e9 que pra ele vai ser uma oportunidade de amadurecimento e que talvez fa\u00e7a diferen\u00e7a para melhor na vida dele, no futuro.<\/p>\n
Mas se a m\u00e3e acha que o cara vai ser o Obama, a\u00ed vai ficar mais dif\u00edcil, n\u00e9? Pra ele e pra mim. Nem preciso dizer que o m\u00eas de dezembro vir\u00e1 com fortes emo\u00e7\u00f5es.<\/p>\n
Enfim, n\u00e3o tenho boas not\u00edcias. A maternidade \u00e9 isso a\u00ed, aprender, aprender e aprender, n\u00e3o desistir, n\u00e3o desistir e n\u00e3o desistir. Que sorte a nossa, hein?<\/p>\n
Beijo para voc\u00eas!<\/p>\n
* Esse texto foi publicado no Fala Frida originalmente no dia 30 de outubro de 2017.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
N\u00e3o curto escrever sobre maternidade e filhos. Sempre acho meus textos sobre o assunto meio pretensiosos. Como todas as m\u00e3es, sempre exagero na admira\u00e7\u00e3o pela minha prole, at\u00e9 os defeitos me divertem, mas acho que pras outras pessoas \u00e9 um pouco chato. As crian\u00e7as s\u00e3o sempre interessantes pra quem as ama loucamente. Ocorre que uma […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":7652,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[206],"tags":[103,135,34,43],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2468"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/9"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2468"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2468\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2471,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2468\/revisions\/2471"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/7652"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2468"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2468"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/falafrida.com.br\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2468"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}